Peer vs. Parent attachment
Dr Gordon Neufeld shares here the vital role parents play in their children’s lives, not their peer aged friends. This is a timely message for so many parents who are increasingly relying on ‘professionals’, be they educators, psychologists, or self help books. He restores parents sense of significance and importance in their children’s lives and thereby empowers parents to be what children need most.
In today’s peer orientated world, parents often believe the lie that socialisation of our children happens best with peers. What has become abundantly obvious in research is that the best socialisation of children happens between parents and children. Not peers!
Peer socialisation is inconsistent, immature and in many cases hurtful. Professionals are impersonal, distant and lack the intimate knowledge of each child. Parents are their child’s best bet when it comes to socialisation and emotional support. The best way to future proof your young child against the dangers of adolescence is to create a strong parent-child bond with your child.
Despite media messages to the contrary, the healthy norm is for even teenagers to turn to their parents first for support, advice and friendship. It’s this relationship that helps keep our children away from the dangers of drugs, promiscuity and suicidal tendencies. It is also the best protection for them against bullies.
So be your child’s best bet by being there for your child. Be encouraged to do what you intuitively know is the right thing to do.
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