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Anxious Clingy Children and Rest

rest
Happy mother and daughter playing and embracing on the floor

Why do children need rest?

If psychological rest is so important, how can I provide it? What is happening in society today that is creating restless children?  This short DVD gives insights into what may be driving this increasing problem with today’s children.

If this video speaks to your parenting need, you’ll want to see our intervention on Anxious clingy children.

What is psychological rest?

Psychological rest is the provision of love with grace – love undeserved, not worked for but given in abundance.

Why time-out is harmful

The recent emphasis on using ‘time out’ as a discipline technique has inadvertently caused restless children. While full of good intentions to stop children from being physically abused, time out has made children subconsciously think they have to work for parental love.

Separation is another cause of unrest in our modern world. These days children experience separation from their primary caregiver at much younger ages than ever before in history. Object permanence, the understanding that Mum and Dad still exist even when I don’t see them is not gained until around 12 months of age or more. So infants who experience separation from their primary care giver, e.g. childcare, develop an unconscious sense of restlessness that can continue on into the primary and even secondary years. Of course, childcare is not the only source of separation. Parents going on holiday, a parent who is ill, or even emotional separation during stressful periods can be significant.

A true sense of safety, security and rest comes from knowing that our parents will abundantly provide closeness, contact, warmth and love. When we have this, we can rest safely and securely. Anxieties cease and a sense of calmness returns to your child.  Anxious children can’t learn efficiently, so this is an essential component to increasing your child’s intellect as well as their sense of psychological wellbeing.

 

If this article speaks to your parenting need, you’ll want to see our intervention on Anxious clingy children.

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